St John Vianney

John, mom, Dad, revolutionaries/soldiers (3), Priest, Napoleon, 1st deserter, other deserters (2), parishioners (3)

(Enter John, parents, Revolutionaries)

When John was a little kid, there was a revolution in France.  Revolutionaries would run through the streets, yelling with ridiculous French accents "La Liberty!"  "Fraternity!"  and "Kill all the priests and rich people you see! Chop off their heads!"

(Enter Priest)

So John and his parents had to sneak around to grow as Catholics.  The priest would sneak to a pub, where John and his family would meet, and they would secretly hold Mass, while the Revolutionaries would run through the audience randomly accusing people of being enemies of the revolution.

(Enter Napoleon)

Then one day a guy named Napoleon took over. Napoleon was short, and tried to hide it by always standing on his tip toes.  Napoleon always spoke with a ridiculous french accent. He said "I'm in charge here! No more chopping off peoples heads!"

The revolutionaries said "awww!"

Napoleon said "It's ok-  we'll go to war with everyone in Europe and kill them instead!"

The revolutionaries said "Yay!"  and jumped up and down, clapping their hands in glee.

Napoleon said "Oh, and by the way, it's not illegal to be Catholic anymore!"

John and his family and the priest all said "Yay!" and jumped up and down, clapping their hands in glee.

John said "Now I can study to become a priest myself!"

But Napoleon said "No you can't.  I need you in my army!"

John said "awww." and made a pouty face.

Then Napoleon yelled "To Spain!" So Napoleon and his soldiers and John all rode off on their imaginary horses, yipping and hollering as they went.

(Exit priest and parents)

But while they were riding, they passed a church.  John said "You guys go ahead!  I'm going to pray here for a minute-  I will catch up!"

(Exit Napoleon, Soldiers)

So John stopped to pray, but when he was done, he looked around and said "hey-  where did they go?"  Then he began to sing "I'm all alone, there's no one here beside me..."

(Enter 1st deserter)

Just then a deserter walked by.  John said "Do you know which way the soldiers went?"

The desserter said "Sure thing, follow me!"  The deserter led him to a barn where other deserters were hiding.

(Enter other deserters)

John said " I wasn't trying to desert! If the soldiers catch us, they will kill us for running away!"

Just then, they heard Napoleon say "Come out come out wherever you are!"

John and the deserters hid in rotting hay bales.

(Enter Napoleon, soldiers)

The soldiers passed by, without seeing the deserters.  One of the deserters was so scared he wet himself!

(Exit Napoleon, soldiers, deserters, enter parishioners, family)

Eventually, John did become a priest.  His parishioners   were all impressed by how holy he was!  In fact they would all line up to go to confession to him!  Sometimes John would hear confessions for 16 hours straight!

John Vianney died at the age of 73.

St John Vianney-  Pray for us!