Prodigal Son

Prodigal, older Brother, Father, questionable women, pigs, swineherder, pigs

(Enter prodigal, brother, father)

Once there was a man who had 2 sons.  He was a good father who loved his sons dearly. He would throw the football to them, wrestle with them, and tussle their hair. And he would say "You boys are the apple of my eye!  I love you dearly!"

The younger son said ”that’s great Dad! Say, do you think you could give me my half of my inheritance?”

His father said “uh, generally to get your inheritance, you have to wait until I’m dead.”

The prodigal said “Well, do you think you could get on with it then? I’d really like my money...”

The audience was flabbergasted! They cried out “How date he!” And “Its an outrage!”

But his father merely sighed, and said “Ok son, here is your share of the inheritance.”

The older brother said “Really?”

But the prodigal said “yeah you did!  Woo hoo!”

(Exit Father and older brother, enter questionable women)

So the prodigal took his money, and went to Vegas!  In Vegas, the prodigal...

Suddenly the prodigal interrupted the narrator and said “whoa-  what’s done in Vegas, stays in Vegas”

The narrator looked annoyed and said “not this time!”

Then he went on with the story

So the prodigal went to Vegas where he met questionable women.  And they did what everyone does in Vegas-  they disco danced.  Then they did the Macarena. Then they put their arms around each other and did the can can.

But eventually, the progigals money ran out!  He said “don’t worry girls, I know of a great polka club on the strip and it’s free!”

But the women said “oh, you’re broke? ew!”

Then they went into the audience to flirt with the rich boys.

(Exit women)

The prodigal said “now what will I do?”

(Enter swine herder and pigs)

Suddenly a swine herder entered, driving his pigs through downtown to wallow in a different mud hole.

He said “hey there son, I could use some help,  wanna job?”

But the prodigal said “I hate pigs!  They are ugly, snotty and stinky!”

The pigs oinked in anger.

But the prodigal said “but I do need a job. Ok”

The pigs squealed with delight and began licking his hands.

The swine herder said “alright, feed this slop to the pigs” and he handed the prodigal a bucket.

The prodigal Looked in the bucket and said “yuck what is this stuff?”

The swineherder said “it is the leftovers from the buffet at the polka club. All mashed together in a swill!”

The prodigal said “I wish I could eat some”

Then he said “look at me! I am so desperate. I should at least go back to my father for he treats his servants better than I am being treated.”

So the prodigal left the swineherd her and the pigs and began the long walk back to his father.

(Enter Father)

When his father saw him coming his father ran in super slow motion to hug his son. He held him tight and pat his hair.

But the prodigal fell on his knees and said “Father! Please forgive me, and take me back as a servant because I do not deserve to be called your son.”

But the father said “you are my son and I love you welcome home son we’re gonna have a party.” And so they did.